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David
Leonard (Euphonium):
I
play euphonium in the band you all tonight can see,
I
don't just play you music as i'm also Secretary.
Invitation
letters come for us to go to fetes,
It's
up to me to write back, and sort out all the dates!
We
play in parks and concerts, to earn us a few cheques,
But
all I hear when we go out is, "Davy, I forgot me specs!!"
Sometimes
the parades are far away and we need to read the map,
The
next thing I always hear is, "Davy, I forgot me cap!!"
In
Windsor Park it's special when the Queen's played on the pitch,
It's
practised over every night so it goes without a hitch!
But
the Yugoslavian Anthem, now what way does that go?
Even
if we play it wrong, only eleven men will know!!
When
on parade i've seen it all, Henry walked into a table,
Freddie
didn't see the arch, and Keith tripped on some cable!
Pot
holes, kerb stones, some police cones, and even signs for
'flood,'
And
yes, you've guessed it, in the twelfth field, lots and lots
of mud!!
The
suppers that are served to us, meringues whipped up so light,
With
sticky buns and caramel squares, our jackets get too tight!
The
concerts, fetes, and big parades, we enjoy the taking part,
But
you'll always get the band out when they serve us rhubarb
tart!!
Eric
McAree (Principle Cornet):
I
play a B-flat cornet, the higher range of notes,
And
when I play a mispitch, i'm the butt of all the jokes!
The
high notes put a pressure on the veins inside my head,
So
lots of notes together and my face, it goes bright red!!
The
pressure gets so great sometimes, you can bet your bottom
dollar,
When
I get home Noreen will say, "Where's the button off your
collar?"
"It
flew off, the thread was weak, I knew it couldn't cope,
Just
to make sure I hit high C next week, will you sew it on with
rope?"
So
come next week the rope hung round my neck, just like a tie,
I
hit high C, the button flew, and hit Eileen in the eye!
The
button landed on the floor, Philip grabbed it in his hand,
And
on the way down, hit his head, off Jamie's music stand!!
The
moral of this story is to wear an old tee shirt,
So
when you come to practice, hopefully, no one will get hurt!
To
hit a high C easily, with a little bit of luck,
I'm
the only one that's sitting, the rest all know to DUCK!!
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